This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Houston, we have a squirter
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
