Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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