I hate your face
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
