Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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