We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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