I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Randomize
