I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
