how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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