super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
