is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
She needs sedatives and a leash
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
