i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Banned from zoo.
Again?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
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