THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
