so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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