Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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