CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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