it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
