Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
