I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
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