Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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