carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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