Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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