If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
