I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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