I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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