I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
