your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Randomize
