i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
