D3 body, D1 cock
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
