I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
