Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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