Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
