she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
