Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm bleeding and have questions
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
