Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
