Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize