That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
