Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
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