My brain says no but my pants say off.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Im part way to drunk.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize