just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
