Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
