She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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