names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
