don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
