it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Randomize
