Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Screwed.edu
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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