Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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