Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
