just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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