Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
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