dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
